It started as a knot in her stomach
Tying and twisting as she remembered
It overtook her
She could not stop it or escape
It happened every time
She found herself here
She knew what it was
Yet had no way to make it cease
It consumed, eroded
Her self worth and composure
Breathe, she told herself
It helped, but not ceased
This knot that twisted inside
Threatened to consume her
And rend her powerless
Felt deep into the emotion
That swelled and seethed
Let it flow through
Without trying to contain it
Then it eased
Her breathing slowed
The knot loosened inside
The clamminess calmed
And she walked away.....
I'm sure many of you can relate to this feeling. That overwhelming feeling of powerlessness that grasps you when you are triggered by something that has left trauma and scarring inside you.
It can be so debilitating, so all consuming that you feel you have absolutely no way of getting out of it.
When you find yourself in this situation, as a way to help you get through it, try the following:
STOP - don't say or do anything
Recognise the emotions you are feeling right there and then
Take 3 deep breaths and exhale fully
If you can, remove yourself from the direct source of the anxiety
Try and see if your rational or irrational mind is in control here
Can you remember when it first reared it's head and caused you to feel this way?
Ask yourself, is this my issue or someone else's?
BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE!
Don't beat yourself up if it doesn't work the first time - this issue may have been affecting you for some time, so cut yourself some slack.
Talk to yourself as you would a friend -
would you tell them to get on with it?
Would you tell them to stop being ridiculous?
Or would you support them as they went through it?
What would you say to yourself if you were not paralysed with fear?
These small suggestions may not fix the problem long term, however, the more you practice them the easier they will get to use.
Also, try to use the practice of mindfulness - being in the present moment.
BE RIGHT THERE.
If you find that these situations are a big issue and are affecting your daily life, please, seek out professional help. Often by addressing the issue and talking it out with someone, you can find the root cause of the trauma and work with it to lessen it's impact on your life.
You can take back your power and begin the road to self-healing.