She sits quietly in the corner
Hoping she'll be absorbed into the wall
She is not comfortable here
All to see her faults on show
No one will listen
What of value could she possibly have to say
So she shrinks herself to appear small
In the hope that no one will want her to speak
Or engage in conversation
"Tell me about yourself", she hears them say
Her mind races for something intelligent, something witty
Something interesting to contribute
Have you ever found yourself in this situation?
Wanting to appear invisible in a social situation so you don't face the rejection of what you have to say as being ridiculous or insignificant?
Most of us have done it at some time or another. Because, really, you are no expert right? Your opinion is probably of no consequence to anyone else - so you keep quiet, nodding occasionally to appear interested and knowledgeable.
And when you are asked about yourself, BLANK!
I had this very situation occur with a woman recently. She found it so uncomfortable to be in social situations, that she started finding excuses not to attend anything that she was invited to.
I asked her why - her answer, "When I meet new people, I don't know what to say when they ask me about myself, I sound like a fraud, an imposter, a fake".
"How can you be a fake?", I replied, "What makes you feel that?"
"I think they will see right through me" came her answer.
I pondered this and said, "They don't know you yet - how can they see anything less than what you are. You are the expert on you - no one else knows you as you know yourself. And that is all you have to be - Yourself! That is enough, be authentic, be enthusiastic about who you are because you are the only one of you there is and that is perfect."
This set off a light bulb "Aha!" moment for her. The phrase - you are the expert on you - seemed to resonate so fully for her. Her eyes lit up and she got it!
No one else knew her as she did, so how could they judge? How could, what she had to say, not be right - they did not know her soul, her heart, her mind.
Happily, she reported back that this had helped her the next time she was invited out with her friends. Not only did she attend, she also met new people and had a great time - being the expert on herself.
We can all take this on board - we are the most knowledgeable about ourselves. Don't let anyone else tell you what you are, who you are, what you think.
You wrote the book on you - keep turning the page and writing the story - then shout it to the world.
You are valuable and visible - speak your truth, you expert you!!